Gettin' My Rant On

Five Annoying Things They Should Fix On The Internet

1. Streaming video that starts as soon as you load a page (not including YouTube and other sites I deliberately go to to watch streaming video). Two of my most regular soccer sites do this and it's a constant pain. One of the sites has even been known to crash Firefox if it isn't stopped immediately (not that crashing Firefox is incredibly tough).

2. "The page you requested is loading, here's an ad page instead". Bollocks! The page I requested is not loading! I know this, because when I click past the ad, my page still has to load. And I have never ever clicked on one of those ads.

3. Banner ads that make sounds. This is especially annoying when you're on a site watching a video, and the freaking banner keeps making noises. I know I can stop this with the Firefox Flash blocker thing, but I kinda like seeing some of the Flash things out there. And it'd be a pain to have to keep manually allowing things.

4. Websites that insist on breaking up Top 10 lists into 10 teeny pages to increase pageview numbers. I understand the rationale, it's just crappy. I have to make 10-11 clicks to read the same amount of information I could have read with one click and a scroll. Yeah... that does sound lazy. But it's the internet! It has changed the definition of laziness. If information is not amazingly accessible, people look elsewhere.

5. Those stupid Evony ads that pop up everywhere. You'd probably seen them. It's some city-building game, and the ads feature busty elf women:They're all over the internet (the ads, not busty elf women. Although I'm sure you can find them if you look). The Guardian has even written about how the game is becoming the most despised on the internet. "Jeff Atwood, a US programmer and blogger, has documented the ads' increasingly racy nature – from a simple medieval warrior promising the game would be "free forever", through a string of increasingly racy images ... until, finally, it was simply advertising itself by showing a pair of breasts." The company that runs it is also being sued by Microsoft for click-fraud, whatever that is. And this from Wikipedia: "A running slogan for the campaign was "Save the queen!", although within the game, there is no queen to save." This Gawker article shows the hilarious progession of the banner ads.

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Well, that's done. I want to draw your attention to this story, and the way it was reported by the website Asylum. I love it.

A Georgia woman was taken into custody after police reportedly discovered a strip club operating in the basement of her home outside Atlanta. More surprisingly, no Atlanta Falcons players were found inside.

At 2:30 a.m. on July 18, cops responded to a noise complaint by a neighbor, who said he saw over 200 teenagers partying in and around the home of Constance Trahan, 28. The arresting officer reported "dancers in the garage and basement area," minors drinking alcohol and a sign that read "1 Dollar Jello Shots."

Trahan's friends maintain that the home was a teen hangout and not a strip club. "It was a regular gathering," said Christyan Hall, who lives with Trahan. "It's just a misunderstanding."

Though no evidence of an official strip club was confirmed, cops apparently found an iPod containing a suspiciously large number of tracks by the Ying-Yang Twins.

Heh heh heh heh heh my emphases added. Any of you who have heard the Ying Yang Twins know just what they're talking about.