If Mythical Creatures Existed No. 2: Centaurs

The existence of centaurs does not, in my eyes, bring as many immediate benefits to our civilisation as mermaids would. However they still have some things to offer, and some ways they could fit in and provide some services to the human world. They are well known as being fairly friendly to humans, but with a violent and animalistic streak that can rear its head.

A list of benefits:
- The big one is telling the future. Centaurs are star-gazers, and have the ability to discern the times through the movements in the heavens. This is a seriously big deal. Having accurate, recognised fortune-tellers advising humans on world events would be a major advantage for whichever world leaders could get them on side. It would make strategic planning for wars and alliances much easier, as well as providing a check and balance to leaders who were pursuing paths that would lead to destruction. Of course, once every side had a few good centaur star-gazers, the advantage might be lost. However, it could mean the beginning of a more peaceful world order.
- Centaurs, at least those descended from Chiron, are known for their wisdom, honour, and "tempered masculinity". They would be especially useful teaching in universities, or advising businesses on strategy and proper corporate governance.
- Rounding up cattle or horses or sheep would be easier if the shepherd could run as fast as their animals. Centaurs could do the job here easily.
- In military terms, they would make useful scouts, as their speed and intelligence would be very handy. They could also carry another solider on their back, although this is a big deal and the soldier and centaur would have to share a lot of respect for one another.

Things we could do for them:
- Help them out with better foot wear and equine health.
- It must be hard cleaning yourself when your arms can't even reach the middle of your back. We could provide proper cleaning and grooming services.

Problem areas: - Unfortunately, centaurs have a severe problem with alcohol. Especially wine. They are known to go crazy at the sniff of wine and start attacking people and getting drunk. This isn't much different to human behaviour, except that we don't have hooves and find it harder to trample people. But the prevalence of alcohol would be a real issue. It would take a lot of organisation and goodwill on behalf of both races to deal with the problem. Alcohol tolerance classes might be needed for the centaurs, while humans would have to limit consumption when in contact with centaurs.
- The centaurs' animal nature has also been a problem in regard to women. There have been several historical instances of rape or attempted rape by centaurs on human women, which is clearly well out of order. While often linked with alcohol consumption, the centaurs were well known in ancient Greece for trying to steal women. There would need to be some high level discussions about the best way to tackle this, because otherwise animosity between the races would get out of hand very very fast.
- Which leads me to another problem - Furries. Yes, those complete weirdos who are sexually attracted to half human, half animal creatures. They'd be alllllll over the centaurs. The humans would have to keep a lid on it, but then you'd also expect that a centaur could handle itself. Still, humans would need to make sure a rough and tough group of furries doesn't try to capture itself a female centaur. Not that a "rough and tough group of furries" is something that will ever exist ever.

Cultural impact:
- It would make the Narnia and Harry Potter films easier to make.
- Centaur literature and oral history would make for fascinating studies, with University courses springing up everywhere.
- The ability to star-gaze would be studied, and enterprising fortune-tellers would begin to claim they were "descended from Chiron's human concubine", or use centaur blood as part of their fortune-telling rituals.
- Putting a centaur in the Big Brother house would be a new low, however it could have the latent benefit of murdering all the other contestants after a sniff of wine, so that might not be so awful.

I had to do a bit of research on this one, because there is less collective memory about the role of centaurs in human history. But it was fun. I'll do another one soon!