Dirty christmas carols

Dirty christmas carols
“Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg...” may be the kind of dirty Christmas carol a kid sings during the holidays. But, the inner mischievous child in many people likes to come out during the season, perhaps as a rebellion against all of the cheerful good tidings! Or maybe more people simply find humor in recreating classic carols with naughty undertones. Whatever the reason, larger audiences are finding explicit holiday tunes top note on their playlists.

Dirty Christmas carols can be found every year popping up around the holidays - and through the year if you happen to like the artist that sings them. Face it, nothing's sacred anymore, and if it's not the traditional Christmas carols being butchered and four letter naughty words added to them, then it's original dirty Christmas carols being sung at the top of people's lungs.

You do realize that we're not talking about the 'Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg?' variety of dirty Christmas carols, right' You do know that we are talking about the Rodney Carrington 'Who put the d**k on the snowman' variations here. Adults tend to let their inner child out to play every so often and when you first hear the dirty Christmas carol come across your stereo speakers, you cannot help but to laugh as the shock value sets in. What's worse is that you know you enjoyed them so much that you're going to go look for more!

These are going to be the Christmas carols you sing for the rest of the season. These dirty little ditties are going to stick in your head and make you smile for no reason and have everyone wondering what is going on - or what you've been doing. Face it, you'll go looking for more because these things are addictive. You'll walk into the grocery or department store and hear the Christmas music playing - sorry folks, but starting to play carols on November 1 would make ANYONE sing dirty Christmas carols - and immediately you're mind is singing the alternate words. Hook, line, and sinker, you're mischievous inner child just popped out.

Of course there are many entertainers, actors, and television personalities that have helped dirty Christmas carols become more known and popular. Larry the Cable Guy has his own medley of naughty notes and even released a Christmas album that was definitely not your 'Bing Crosby sings White Christmas' fare. As a matter of fact, go to any music store during the holiday season and take a look at all the compact disks that are there. You are going to discover that close to a quarter of the selections are adult in nature.

Sacrilegious' No. Dirty Christmas carols are people's way of having a bit of adult oriented fun during the season. When you're stressed out from shopping and wondering how you're going to buy your child the new Wii-GameBoy-Xbox-Playstation999 gaming system that costs half a year's salary, dirty Christmas carols tend to help relieve the stress. Otherwise more people would go postal, including the dude wearing the little red suit. And tell me how red blooded American men are supposed to not think dirty thoughts and sing dirty Christmas carols when Santa's elves are this skinny little thing in dresses up to you know where'

Obviously you do not want your children hearing these nasty little songs. If they do, you may be driving up to the local elementary school and being harangued?okay chastised?by the principal. Not to mention having to explain to your child what d**k is. Or other parts of the human anatomy that is referred to by indecent language that a child shouldn't hear. Hey! Don't look at me! It's not my fault they heard you playing the dirty Christmas carols last night!

Dirty christmas carols

Dirty christmas carols

Dirty christmas carols

Dirty christmas carols

Dirty christmas carols

Source: theholidayspot, lifeafterwcg2, clipartof, americancorner, allthingschristmas

Funny christmas carols

Funny christmas carols

Funny Christmas songs are common and fairly popular, especially with the younger generation. However, it was not always like this. Christmas songs have a history going back centuries. In fact, back in 129 AD, a song called "Angel Hymn" was recommended by a roman Bishop to be sung at Christmas services. It was, arguably, the first "Christmas song." Other songs were written soon afterwards, but most of them were written in Latin, something that common people couldn't understand. Thus the songs went fairly unappreciated and sank into oblivion.

Funny christmas carols

Funny christmas carols

Funny christmas carols

Funny christmas carols

Source: 123greetings, donatosoranno, free-greetingcards, greet2k

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus T. Connor (c) 1952
I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe last night.
She didn't see me creep
down the stairs to have a peep;
She thought that I was tucked
up in my bedroom fast asleep.
Then, I saw Mommy tickle Santa Claus
Underneath his beard so snowy white;
Oh, what a laugh it would have been
If Daddy had only seen
Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night.

I'll Be Home For Christmas Kim Gannon, Walter Kent (c) 1943

I'll be home for Christmas
You can count on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
and presents on the tree

Christmas Eve will find me
Where the love light gleams
I'll be home for Christmas
If only in my dreams
It's the most wonderful time of the year Eddie Pola, George Wyle 1963

It's the most wonderful time of the year.
With the kids jingle belling,
and everyone telling you,
"Be of good cheer,"
It's the most wonderful time of the year.

There'll be parties for hosting,
marshmallows for toasting and
caroling out in the snow.
there'll be scary ghost stories and
tales of the glories of Christmases
long, long ago.

It's the most wonderful time of the year.
There'll be much mistletoeing
and hearts will be glowing,
when loved ones are near.
It's the most wonderful time of the year.

Jingle Bell Rock
Bobby Helms

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowing and blowing up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancing and prancing in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air.

What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go gliding in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jingling feet
That's the jingle bell,
That's the jingle bell,
That's the jingle bell rock.
Jingle Bells James Lord Pierpont publ. 1857

Dashing through the snow
On a one-horse open sleigh,
Over the fields we go,
Laughing all the way;
Bells on bob-tail ring,
making spirits bright,
What fun it is to ride and sing
A sleighing song tonight
Jingle bells, jingle bells,
jingle all the way!
O what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh

A day or two ago,
I thought I'd take a ride,
And soon Miss Fanny Bright
Was seated by my side;
The horse was lean and lank;
Misfortune seemed his lot;
He got into a drifted bank,
And we, we got upsot.
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle all the way!
What fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh.

A day or two ago,
the story I must tell
I went out on the snow
And on my back I fell;
A gent was riding by
In a one-horse open sleigh,
He laughed as there
I sprawling lie,
But quickly drove away.
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle all the way!
What fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh.

Now the ground is white
Go it while you're young,
Take the girls tonight
And sing this sleighing song;
Just get a bob-tailed bay
two-forty as his speed
Hitch him to an open sleigh
And crack! you'll take the lead.
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle all the way!
What fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh.


Jolly Old Saint Nicholas

Jolly old Saint Nicholas,
lean your ear this way!
Don't you tell a single soul
what I'm going to say:
Christmas Eve is coming soon;
now, you dear old man
Whisper what you'll bring to me;
tell me if you can.

When the clock is striking twelve,
when I'm fast asleep
Down the chimney, broad and black,
with your pack you'll creep
All the stockings you will find
hanging in a row
Mine will be the shortest one,
you'll be sure to know

Bobby wants a pair of skates,
Suzy wants a sled
Nellie wants a picture book,
yellow, blue, and red
Now I think I'll leave to you
what to give the rest
Choose for me, dear Santa Claus;
you will know the best.

Let It Snow! Sammy Cahn, Jule Styne (c) 1945

Oh, the weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful,
And since we've no place to go,
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

It doesn't show signs of stopping,
And I brought some corn for popping;
The lights are turned way down low,
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

When we finally say good night,
How I'll hate going out in the storm;
But if you really hold me tight,
All the way home I'll be warm.

The fire is slowly dying,
And, my dear, we're still good-bye-ing,
But as long as you love me so.
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Mary, Did You Know? c. 1991 Word Music ( a division of Word, Inc.) and Rufus Music (admin. by Keeling & Company, Inc, Nashville, TN) Words: Mark Lowry Music: Buddy Greene
Mary, did you know
That your baby boy will one day walk on water?
Mary, did you know
That your baby boy will save our sons and daughters?
Did you know
That your baby boy has come to make you new?
This child that you've delivered
Will soon deliver you

Mary, did you know
That your baby boy will give sight to a blind man?
Mary, did you know
That your baby boy will calm a storm with His hand?
Did you know
That your baby boy has walked where angels trod?
And when you kiss your little baby
You've kissed the face of God

Mary, did you know?
The blind will see
The deaf will hear
And the dead will live again
The lame will leap
The dumb will speak
The praises of the Lamb

Mary, did you know
That your baby boy is Lord of all creation?
Mary, did you know
That your baby boy will one day rule the nations?
Did you know
That your baby boy is heaven's perfect Lamb?
This sleeping child you're holding
Is the Great I Am

Oh Mary did you know?