So many links it's like I'm getting linked to the max

So so so many links. I hope you like links. Cos I'm about to drop some knowledge on you.

- Usain Bolt is 30 years ahead of his time.
- The Punch argues that atheists should be subject to the same logical criticisms as theists. Which makes too much sense, so surely someone has written something arguing why both sides can abide by different rules.
- NY Mag looks at the growth of table service as a way of introducing wealthy men and available women. This is how Tiger Woods met a lot of his ladies. It's an interesting article. I personally find it kinda dumb, but then I suppose if I was super rich but also ugly and a tool then I might find it useful.
- Good character development contains the all-important "F*** Yeah!" moment.
- Bill Simmons (aka the Sports Guy) does an awesome job answering people's questions. I repeat - I want his job.

Q: IS THERE A MORE ODD COUPLE THAN HAYDEN PANETTIERE AND WLADIMIR KLITSCHKO?
--Ryan, Portland, Maine
SG: Agreed. They're such an odd couple that they broke Ryan's caps lock. I'm just shocked that two people unseated Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes as "the celebrity couple that looks the strangest in all photographs."
By the way, did you ever consider the parallels between the Klitschkos destroying heavyweight boxing and the Williams sisters destroying women's tennis? Name me your favorite heavyweight fight of the last 10 years. You can't. Name me your favorite women's tennis match of the past 10 years. You can't. The Klitschkos won't fight each other; the Williams sisters refuse to go all out against each other. It sucks. The only thing that could redeem what happened here: If the Klitschkos and Williams sisters started double-dating each other and shattered the "celebrity couple that looks the strangest in all photographs" record.

Q: Doesn't your "Ten Minutes with Tiger" interview demonstrate that Michael Jordan didn't leave basketball for the stated reason, to play baseball? Why keep playing after three straight NBA championships? To quote Tiger Woods, to "Win. Keep winning." Think about it. Jordan and Tiger have similar hypercompetitive personalities. Destroy everyone, every time. We already knew Tiger was one of the greats years ago, just as we knew Jordan was one of the greats in 1994. Yet, Jordan's legacy wasn't cemented in 1994. The greatest athletes don't compete with their peers. They compete for their places in history. There's no way he walked away from basketball voluntarily.
--John S., Sacramento
SG: (Nodding vigorously.)


Q: You wrote that Tiger is one of the "five dumbest adulterers of all time." Is this an actual list? If there is, who are the other four?
--Greg E., Phoenix
SG: Sorry, Bill Clinton has to be No. 1. Doing it in the Oval Office, in the White House, where there's a log of everyone who visits you, has to be the most reckless move in adultering history. I'd make John Edwards second, Tiger third, Jim Bakker and Gary Hart tied for fourth, and Hugh Grant fifth.
The smartest adulterer ever? Brad Pitt. He upgraded from a workaholic actress who didn't want kids to the hottest/craziest/sexiest woman alive who doubles as a fetus machine … and with no real career repercussions! In fact, nothing Brad Pitt does ever seems to come back and haunt him. Not even his latest beard, when he was a few rubber bands and a ponytail away from looking like Captain Lou Albano. Everything bounces off that dude.

- Here he writes about teams who are officially tortured. It includes the conditions you need to meet in order for your sporting team to be considered tortured. I think St Kilda definitely fits the bill in the AFL.
- And here he looks at how to reinvigorate NBA teams with trades. Go Bucks!
- And here Simmons reveals some of the things he cut from his book on the NBA.

A big theme of my book is The Secret of winning basketball, something Isiah Thomas explains to me at a topless pool in Las Vegas. (The Secret, in a nutshell: Teams only win titles when their best players forget about statistics, sublimate their own games for the greater good and put their egos on hold.) Another big theme of my book: Kobe Bryant's inability to grasp The Secret. He wanted to win a title, but only on his terms. That's what made him the most fascinating player of his generation. In the book, I even spend three pages comparing him to the wolf in Teen Wolf.

I found the bit about the rigged 2001 finals series between Philadelphia and Milwaukee interesting too.There was some dodgy stuff going on in the NBA for a few years. And the bit about whether Grant Hill's career was ruined by the shoe endorsement deal he signed was good too.
- The 13 levels of losing. Reading this is a bit of a kick in the guts if you've ever supported a sporting team. Especially one that constantly underachieves.
- How Lady Gaga became the world's biggest pop star. She really is, people.
- A strange piece from an 18-year-old NY Gossip Girl type who is cheating on her boyfriend.
- Arsenal's Andrei Arshavin answers fan questions. He is a strange dude.