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Who You Are
You have a special zeal for life
You're a woman with a very balanced personality and lifestyle. You believe in making room in life to relax, think, and have fun. You refuse to settle long-term for a boring job or doing something just because it's expected of you. Love is the same way. You know what real love feels like and you'll accept no imitations! You pride yourself on not being the "typical woman." You're more honest and straightforward than most women. But just because you don't "wear your heart on your sleeve" doesn't mean you lack deep feelings. In fact, you're deeply committed to your loved ones and the causes you believe in. Women as truly balanced as you are very rare.
What's dating all about to you?
You believe dating and life in general is about learning and growing as a person. You have a great skill for connecting with people, so dating comes relatively easily to you. However, it's hard for you to have a real intellectual connection with an attractive man. Hopefully, you've found a way to "go with the flow" in dating as you already do in other parts of your life.
You face two major challenges in finding the love of your life. First, because your mind is so busy making sure you say and do the right things on dates, it's hard for your deeper and caring self to come through. It feels risky to share this part of yourself. Second, although having a vision of what you want can be helpful, the risk is that your high standards can get in the way of loving a real-life imperfect man.
How unique is your type?
Your personality profile is similar to a number of women your age. Looking at over 10,000 women who have taken the test, about 31.4% (or 1 in 3 women) have very similar beliefs, values, and habits. Of course, the way these qualities are expressed in you is what makes you so unique.
Quirks men notice
Like all women, you have your strengths as well as your quirks and shortcomings. Ultimately, you want to find someone who will love and accept you "warts and all." Though you have lots of friends, it's important to have at least one person in your life who understands.
You have a pretty even-tempered personality and may not have any especially annoying or quirky habits. Of course, seeming to be "perfect" could be seen as a flaw by some, in which case you may just want to pretend to have a bad habit!
Do men like your type?
Notice that 33% of men are generally attracted to your personality type. 7% say they are VERY attracted. With the millions of people on Match.com, that translates into lots of potential matches.
Who You're Looking For
He'll be an enigma
You're looking for a very balanced man. He'll have clear goals in life without being a dreamer. You'll both enjoy going out with friends but also love spending quiet times together. He'll manage to balance an objective and rational side with a very compassionate and caring side. On top of that, he'll be a fun and free spirit but still do what he promises and show up on time. Sound too good to be true? Men who are truly balanced like this are rare, but they do exist and would be an excellent fit for you.
You don't expect your partner to be in a good mood all the time. You understand that sometimes your partner will be down, get pessimistic or worry too much. These days are balanced by the many good days the two of you will share. In fact, you share a number of positive qualities, including:
You both share a cheerful and optimistic outlook on life.
Number of men your type
Men with the exact type of personality you prefer are rare gems. Looking at over 10,000 men who have taken this test, only 6% (or 1 in 17 men) have the exact combination of similarities and contrasts in personality you find extremely appealing.
However, there's a larger group, 25% (or 1 in 4 men), who have most, but not all, of the qualities and habits you like. These subgroups are charted below.
About two-thirds (69%) of the men have at least some of the traits you find attractive.
But you'd have a negative reaction to 31% (or 1 in 3 men), who have some or many of the characteristics you clearly dislike.
Finding someone like you
You want to share your life with someone who has the same values, goals, and style you have. Research has shown that couples who have more in common tend to stay together longer. The qualities you find attractive (and unattractive) in men suggest you would certainly be happier with a man who's more like you.
No very strong opposites were detected, which suggests that you are most attracted to men who are very similar to you. This is good news since similar couples tend to stay together longer.
Quirks you can tolerate
The truth is that everyone is potentially "high maintenance." We all have our quirks and shortcomings. The key to long-term harmony is finding a man who can tolerate (or maybe even enjoy) your "quirks," or the little personal oddities that make you unique. You seem okay with several common quirks that might come along with your "ideal" man:
His tendency to get a little jealous won't bother you too much and at times may even be flattering.
You can get frustrated by his lack of input on decisions. Typically you're left alone to make decisions about what to do, where to go, etc. But most of the time the balance between you helps things go very smoothly.
Downside of your "ideal"
In addition to his quirks, your "ideal" personality type may have other qualities that are more frustrating or challenging to deal with. Under stress, his quirks can become serious "flaws." But remember, these quirks are the "flip side of the coin," or the extreme end of qualities you otherwise find appealing. So, be prepared if:
Because you're most attracted to men with balanced personalities, no troubling differences were noted. Nevertheless, remember that too much similarity can lead to conflict as well, especially when problems call for very different perspectives or actions.
Deal breakers
You seem ready to adapt to the good and frustrating qualities of the men you're looking for, but there are types of men you clearly do NOT like. Men's habits and attitudes you'd have a hard time putting up with include:
Your responses suggest that you are pretty accepting and tolerant of shortcomings. No major personality "deal breakers" or reasons to rule out potential dates were identified.
Trade-offs you'll face
Good Qualities Challenging Qualities
Tries to balance spending time with a few close friends and going out with a big group of friends. Given the demands of family, friends, and activities, it's hard to find time alone together.
Tries to balance a creative and imaginative side, with "real world" pragmatics about what you can and cannot do. Promising ideas are often dropped if they don't succeed right away.
Tries to balance an objective view of problems with compassion for the people and feelings involved. Competing drives from your rational vs. compassionate points of view can stand in the way of making decisions.
Tries to be decisive, but still not rush into anything. How much attention is given to problems and how decisions get made seems unpredictable.
Attraction Science
What is personality?
Personality is the set of traits and characteristics that make each of us unique yet relatively stable and consistent over time.
- People see and interpret the world differently.
- They want different things.
- They make decisions differently.
- They get excited and energized by different situations.
- They structure their careers, social life, and private time in different ways.
What does personality have to do with attraction?
The way in which people are similar or different in personality strongly affects their attraction to one another. Two people with similar values are more likely to become (and stay) friends or a couple, indeed part of compatibility is having "common ground." However, for many people, compatibility may also involve a balance between each other's quirks and differences.
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